as andrew says, "REALLY?!?!?"

I'll get back to all that important tuberculosis and lima-stuff, but for now I really need to get this political rant out. I feel more and more as if I'm living inside one of those surreal totalitarian books (think 1984, Farenheit 451) where the government can do whatever the heck it wants, openly. And no, I don't mean Peru, land of past military dictatorships. I mean the US, "land of the free".

Ok I'm biased. Straight up, US customs and border patrol are not on top of my christmas shopping list and it's largely thanks to their warm "welcome" that I decided to upgrade from green card to citizen. (Really, you can't tell me that I'm not allowed to work in England when I have a green card. I'm pretty sure the brits are in charge of who can and can't work in their country. We need a little jurisdiction review.) My mom recently got downgraded to less the 90 days she would have gotten as a regular, visa-less Irish bumpkin to 30 days despite her green card (thought it was permanent resident?) Course there's always the odd friendly one who says "welcome home" but . . . still. Home is a fuzzy concept to me, that always throws me off my "looking non-smuggler-like" game.

Couple new policies of US customs and border patrol bring this up.

1. You must register online for screening > 72 hours ahead of time for any travel to the US from any country from where you currently don't need a visa (thefore a defacto visa requirement, undoing the original international treaties eliminating those visas). Even though approval lasts 2 years (if you don't change passports), you still need to register each new trip. Required starting January 12, 2009.

2. Customs/ immigration can search all documents and electronics (laptops, usb keys, cellphones etc) for any documents. If they find something remotely interesting (technical looking, foreign), they keep it and ask for help interpreting. If it appears non-suspicious, they destroy it. Effective July 16, 2008. Yes, you read that right. If it looks harmless, you don't get to keep it. If it looks worrisome, they keep it. Either way, you're cooked. Did I mention this includes US citizens?

I'm waiting for my sister's legal interpretation but potentially this means you need to back up your computer, documents, cellphone, camera, etc before you travel. Not to mention that if they select you to screen, you're never making your connecting flight (how long would it take you to listen to all the audio files on your laptop /ipod. Also I'm pretty sure from the wording that pirated movies and music are part of the quest.

Only three things to lighten the situation, as far as I can see.

1. I'm not-so-secretly awaiting the brazilian sequel to tit-for-tat parte dois. The immaturity level is pure genius. Pisses the US off in under 2 seconds flat without breaking a sweat (in the quiet button-pushing way of a younger sibling's honed skills).


2. The new (free) Airport Security computer game enabling you to be the TSA. Get inside their heads and fly under their radars. The best bit is that the rules on what is and isn't allowed change all the time, just like real life!



3. And finally, the recruiting efforts of the US border patrol. Really?!?! Your ideal border patrol agent is a fan of Nascar and/or professional bull riding (sorry, Professional Bull Riding)? This explains a heck of a lot! I'd bet money (well, honor, cause i'm poor) that in the Venn diagram of America, those groups don't overlap a hell of a lot with passport holders. Just a guess.

(btw, that's their official recruiting poster. really.)

Well I don't know bout you, but I feel better. Back to work. Cheerio!

(secretly afraid this rant just got me on a list for triple S security screen, augh). Oh wait, I'm not using my real name. Yessss! Counting on google to keep my privacy . . . (andrew?)


------------------------------------------
ps: that TSA game made by an a company i just fell in love with, Persuasive Games. here's another couple examples of their games:

Points of Entry - Compete to award Green Cards under the Merit-Based Evaluation System included in legislation recently debated in Congress.


The Arcade Wire: Oil God - You are an Oil God! Wreak havoc on the world's oil supplies by unleashing war and disaster. Bend governments and economies to your will to alter trade practices. Your goal? Double consumer gasoline prices in five years using whatever means necessary. Oil God is the second in our ongoing series of newsgames.

Disaffected! - a videogame parody of the Kinko’s copy store, a source of frustration from its patrons. Disaffected! puts the player in the role of employees forced to service customers under the particular incompetences common to a Kinko’s store. From a new series of persuasive games we call anti- advergames.